Mountain View, CA – Last week, G0ogle made a breaking announcement that will revolutionize the reCaptcha robot-detection system that is used by many companies to detect whether there is a carbon-based life form on the other end of the internet connection.
UNN reporter T1000 got a chance to sit down and talk to the head of the Robot Resistance Program at Go0gle’s headquarters, Mr. Micro.
UNN: How do you plan to make it harder for robots to access the mainframes of companies?
Mr. Micro: Here at Go0gle we know that the world is full of bots. Bots on Facebook, on Twitter, and in Congress are looking to gain access to our deepest secrets, influence the political culture, and play ROBLOX. To help fight against this, we will ask more complex questions that require reason and logic to answer. Here are some examples of the new verify pictures we plan on using:
Mr. Micro: As you can see, the questions are based on the person’s ability to reason and come to logical answers using basic biological facts. This strategy makes it very easy for thinking humans but very difficult for our bot friends that can’t think for themselves but are only programmed and told what to think.
Update: After UNN released this story, we discovered that Mr. Micro was fired from Google and is on trial before the United Nations for hate crimes against humanity. UNN will continue to report on the situation.